It's been months since I last wrote but this post has been a while coming.. It was just a matter of building myself up to writing it.. I still don't think I have the right words but in this situations I don't there are the "right" words.
A lot has changed in my life since I was last talking to you all on the blog.. And this is why I have been quiet the last few months.
Both my lovely, bubbly mum who was full of laughs & wisdom and my Granny L, full of wit & chat passed away at the end of September last year after loosing their battles with cancer.
It was a shock loosing my mum, as she had been fighting it since last December & things were looking good. However, cancer has a way of springing things on you & quite rapidly last August things took a turn for the worst.
My granny was also fighting cancer for the months previous too, but we knew she wouldn't get better so life had been a blur of hospital visits with mum & trying to make gran as comfortable as possible.
My gran passed away after a long, hard fight on Friday 18th September. During her funeral my mum's body was rapidly closing down due to her cancer taking over & we rushed from my gran's funeral to be beside my mum's hospital bed. She lost her battle Sunday 20th September.
Life since that has been going through the motions.. Dealing with grief & loss, the change.. The deafening silence with no mum in the house talking the ear of some poor unfortunate on the phone.. and trying to remember that for both of them they are no longer suffering or in pain so they are at peace.
Myself & Simon are getting married in May & this day will be so bittersweet & an emotional roller coaster but I know that both my grannies & my wee mum will be there in spirit that day.
I will gradually get back to blogging bit I just needed to.. Wanted to.. Had to, put this down on a post.. Until then, love you all & talk soon.
P.S. Thank you to all who have been & still continue to be rocks of support & love. I will never be able to express in words how much it meant & still means to hear that.